Decisions, Decisions!

Let me preface this post by saying You wanna get cut? *pullin' out my blade* Then ask me how I did at the casino today! On the bright side, I am going to the grand opening of this club tonight. Yeah, yeah I know I should be getting ready but we aren't leaving until 11ish. My girl calls and says we need to be there because it's the place to be and it's been advertised as the "hot" new club. Because she is friends with a friend of the owner, we would most definitely get the VIP treatment(as if there is any other way). I'm getting excited and then I ask her what she is wearing, and this ho says an evening gown. Shooot, I was about to make it a jean night for real. I was thinking some skinny jeans, colorful cami and some stilettos until she tells me that the dress code is red carpet sexy...RED CARPET SEXY? WTF is that? I would most definitely be sexy in my jeans but who ever heard of red carpet sexy? What do they expect, a floor length ball gown with plunging neck and back lines and a swanky, sophisticated updo. I don't know. That threw a wrench in my whole plan now I have to come up with another ensem. I guess I can throw on a dress but I'll be damned if I wear an evening gown to a club opening, floor length one at that. Anyway, let me get off of here and ransack the closet for the perfect little dress.

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Will I ever Learn.

I posted yesterday about losing my money at the casino and one would think that would be lesson enough--- right? WRONG!!! I took my butt right on back there today and this time I lost $160. I don't know what is wrong with me. I was the only person who didn't win today and yes, I was pissed. I'm a hater!! I admit it and what? I was perfectly fine with my losing streak when I had my girl losing right along with me. Didn't matter that the two other people with me had their machines jingling and clinking like crazy. At least I wasn't the only one losing. About 5 minutes before we were about to leave, my girl won $241+ dollars, on the 2 cent slot machine no less. I wanted to be happy for her, I really did but dayum, why couldn't that be me...ya know? I wanted to at least win back the money that I threw away on my frivolous spending spree(ie. I don't have shyt to show for it and don't even know what I spent it on). AAh well, I may as well close out the week day with a bang and hit up the casino one mo 'gin just to see if my luck has changed any. Ya'll wish me luck and if I win, I might throw a few dollars your way...*wink*

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Dayum Right I find It Offensive!

So today I get a call asking if I want to go out to the casino. I have nothing else planned for today so I say what the hell. Should've stayed my ass right at home because a sista came back broke as hell. Good thing I left all my cards,(credit and banking) in my other purse because those slots were calling me, you hear me? I'm off work until the 18th because I was supposed to keep right on traveling after my weekend jaunt but the rest of the crew is broke. I haven't quite gotten ballsy enough to go on holiday by my lonesome just yet. I figure that I would need at least one other person with me that I can talk shit with. I'm working on the crew though. Hopefully we can do something within the states since out of the country is a no go. Where ever we go, I would like to drive but they would want to fly. I figure it would cost about $300-$400 in gas driving but the benefit of being able to take myself where ever I may fancy once I get there will be well worth it. They would like to fly because it may be cheaper and,of course, you'd get there quicker but a diva like myself is always down for road trippin'.


I know ya'll are probably thinking "What the hell does that have to do with being offended?" I'm getting to that right now. I went with an aquaintance to pick up the kid at summer day camp. I'm sitting in the car waiting for them to come out and this little girl comes running out the door and straight outside the fence (now the fence doesn't have a door on it--it is sort of 2 long fences with a sidewalk in between) The mother comes out with another child and starts yelling to her daughter to "get back here" the daughter comes running back and she tells her that she is not to go past the line because someone could take her. (I'm still in my car looking at them and listening) so she continues to talk to her and then she squats down to her child's level, directly in front of my car(in front of my open window) and don't you know this bitch points directly at me and tells her child that a stranger like this lady will take you.(now I know you are thinking "oh no that bitch didn't and my response would be "oh yes that bitch did". I think that warranted a face to face so I get out of my car and say "Miss, I am not in the business of taking other peoples children." She starts to say something but I cut her off and say "Now I understand the importance of talking to your children about strangers and running off and things but for you to point directly at me and tell your child that this lady will take her is rude and offensive. I have not, nor will I ever feel the need to take someones elses child and I damn sure don't want yours. That's why it's best that you save those types of talks for the privacy of your own home. It took everything in me not to call her out of her name but I kept it civil and held my tongue. She apologized and said that she meant nothing by it and she also said that she was sorry, to wich I responded "As you should be!" Although I couldn't hear everything she said (I saw her point and heard the part about me) I wouldn't have put it past her not to have told her child to be wary of the niggers because they will take her. (Yes, she was white in case you are wondering) but that really makes no difference at all. She could've been African American, Asian, Hispanic or what have you and I still would've had the same reaction. Rudeness is rudeness no matter race, color, creed, or class and with me, always, ALWAYS unacceptable. *stepping down off of my soapbox*

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A few flicks from my weekend jaunt

As short of a jaunt as it was, I still managed to take a few pics and you better not say anything about my pic-taking skills either because ya girl never claimed to be a master photog. I really had my heart set on taking a couple of photosgraphs inside the civil rights museum but alas, it was not meant to be as cameras, camera phones,camcorders and the like were prohibited. The museum was an eye opener and some of the sights could've definitely brought out the bish in a negra if her heart wasn't in the right place. Just a few flicks. (click the bottom right hand corner to flip through the album in case you didn't know)

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Fla-vor Flaaaaav!!! Yeahhhh Boyyyyyy!

What we all have been waiting for has finally arrived. Yes, That is right, the second season of Flavor OF Love aired yesterday on VH1 and it did not disappoint! If you are unfamiliar with the show(what planet are you on?), it stars Flavor Flav (Hype man for the rap group Public Enemy) and a slew of women vying for his affections. Each week, Flavor spends time with the women (personally and in groups) dating, taking them places, putting them to the test and at the end of each week several women are eliminated. Those who are chosen to stay, are presented with a big ass clock(ala Flav's trademark) and it starts all over until one woman is left standing to ride off into the sunset with Mr. Flava. Last season was plaqued with golddiggers galore and the winner, MS. HOOPZ(gold digging, fame-seeking,thirsty chick),

ended up leaving Flavor as soon as the cameras stopped rolling. She was all about the money and her 15 minutes of fame (and believe me that bish got her money's worth.)leaving Flav no choice but to try his hand at love again.

On to this week's episode. The girls are clamoring to meet Flav and as expected there is a wide variety for him to choose from. Flav didn't seem to have the same enthusiasm as last year, but he had quite a mix ranging from the attractive,("Krazy", "Deelishis", "Beatuful" "Buckeey", "Nibblz", "Tiger", "Bootz" Payshintz", "Spunkeey",) to the ""unpretty ("Somethin","Like Dat", "H-town","Wire") just to name a few. The stand outs are "Buckwild", the self proclaimed crazy black chick (although she is obviously white, I would agree and say that she is indeed, The blackest white chick you would ever want to meet.) "Toastee"(named because she obviously likes to get her drink on as evidenced by the fact that the chick was "lit" as soon as the first bottle was cracked open.) "Spunkeey", (the hater of the group.) Yes, she is an attractive female but lacking in self confidence and esteem because this bish had a negative comment to say about everyone in the house. Not to mention the fact that she is an obvious lover of drama and a trick (not in the whorish sense as we haven't had a chance to see that side yet) but in the sense that she is already running back to Flav tattling on some of the girls) "Nibblz"( who has a hellified lisp which Flavor likens to that of Mr. Mike Tyson---she's also a self proclaimed ear biter as well), "Somethin",( the "Big Girl" with mucho attitude who speaks her mind and keeps it R-E-A-L) they are also the Bi/lesbians of the house. They lick clit and aren't ashamed to say so! "EYEZ", (Flavor's personal spy who was sent to get the low -low on the girls and report back to Flav to help weed out the diggaz, hoes, and fame seeking chicks) and "Like Dat", the supersized mama (with the super sized breastis to match who talks a good game but doesn't really have the looks to back it up (which is shallow as hell, I know but that's Hollywood for ya.)

This episodes starts off with a bang!! After meeting and naming the girls, Flav sends them to pick a bed knowing that there are more women than beds. H-town (white chick and a Black chick) are squabbling over the beds which the black chick appeared to have gotten to first. H-town then proceeds to take the black chick's flowers and throw them at her hitting her in the face and that was all she wrote. MS. Black chick went off and pushed her and then had her in a headlock pounding her in her head and all I could hear was "Ouch!, No! Get off of me!" H-town received a thorough Ass whupping that day.( feel free to view said asswhuppin' below)


Flav , upon hearing the ruckus, is quick to let the girls know that his show is not the Flavor Springer show and he ain't having it in his crib. He then summons each member involved in the smackdown to his quarters to get each of their stories separately (peep the aftermath below)

Flavor then reveiwed the tape which showed that both girls were obvious liars but he still chose to kick the black chick off ( it's a shame too because she would've made for great TV )and while doing so, the white chick seemed to regain enough courage to talk shit galore knowing that Flav's right hand man was there to hold old girl back. After the melee, the girls continue to drink and try to spend some one-on-one time with Flav. During the eliminations Flav revealed his spy and chose 12 ladies to keep (some based on the reccommmendations of EYEZ, his spy,) and presented them with ginormous clocks. After the ladies who weren't chosen("Choclate", "Hood", "H-Town", "Bama and the blackest white chick, "Buckwild") left, the ladies and Flav start to smell something. The stench is horrid and while trying to figure out the source of it, Flav views the tape and sees one of the girls, dip out of the frame for a few and then return. They also see her going up the stairs. A few minutes later one of the girls also goes upstairs and sees a pile of shit on the steps(that's right yall, real live doodoo,dookey,turds,crap,mess or whatever you want to call it). Flav is rather puzzled as they don't have any dogs in the house and noticing that "Somethin" is the only girl not present but missing,they deem her the obvious culprit. They go upstairs, where "Somethin" is in the restroom(that bitch better be cleaning herself up thoroughly) and Flav knocks on the door while the other ladies are giggling and talking shit. "Somethin" peeks out and takes responsibility for shitting on herself (without the least bit of shame I might add. Now that's a real Bish there) and trailing it up the stairs saying "yeah I did it but I had to go, I tried to hold it but my stomach was like bitch, you got me fucked up." Flav handles it like a pro. It was obvious that he was a little "shitty" at her but he respected her gangsta in the fact that she kept it real which was rather refreshing in the midst of a plethora of obvious fake beeyatches! I was wondering how this season would fair. They needed to come hard to top last season's drama with New York and Punkin and as expected Flavor and the girls did not disappoint!! I'll definitely be watching this season, You be sure to check it out if you can!

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Bo knows, But this chick didn't--until it was too late!

Why is it that whenever I leave town, I am filled with such dread and despair upon my return?( well maybe those words are too harsh but a girl is seriously hating to come back home to the same old, same old) I absolutely hate coming back and I had such a good time too. Of course,the fact that I had to get up at 4:00 in the A.M. in order to meet my ride at 5:30 so I could catch my 7:30 A.M. flight could've had something to do with it. While I'm waiting for the plane to arrive so that I can board, I notice some luggage sitting off to the side unattended.(like I stated in a previous post, this sista here, doesn't miss a beat. I notice everything and everyone) The disabled passengers and families with small children have already boarded and it's time for the remaining passengers to board. Still, no one claims the luggage so a few passengers start to board and then all of the sudden, a man comes running up and he is none other than Bo Jackson. (Although he looked familiar, I couldn't really place the face until the end of the flight) but I say to him "So that's who this luggage belongs to" and he responds "Yes, now did you take all that money out that I had in there" and I said "I sure did, but I was careful to leave you a couple of dollars just in case you find yourself in need." He says "Thanks for making it lighter for me and I say "Any time gorgeous, Any time" He boards and heads for the final rows in the rear of the plane, I sit a little more toward the front. At some point during the flight, he comes and sits beside me and we strike up a silly convo with him never letting on who he is. By silly, I mean more of a joking banter back and forth like the exchange about the luggage we had earlier. He returns to his seat a little before we land but not before telling me that he enjoyed "shootin' the breeze with me" and I replied "likewise." All the while,I'm still trying to figure out where I know this man from. All of a sudden it hits me, those "Bo knows" commercials run through my head and I'm like "That's it! He looks like Bo Jackson" but because this man looked extrememly young(he's actually 44 but looked much younger with a tight and fit body) and I vaguely remember his commericals airing around the same time OJ was running through the airport for Hertz, I dismissed that thought for the time being. I deboard and hit the restroom and as I'm exiting, I see him running (guess he was running a bit late) through the concourse and I yell out "I knew you looked familiar" and then I said "Bo Knows" and he starts to laugh and then says "Gotcha! Hey, what's your name and number? Now I'm not above a bit of ghettoness every now and then, but shouting out my name and number in a crowded airport in an attempt to get a retired athlete to call was a bit much so I played it off like I didn't hear him and kept it moving. Too bad for him. lol! Maybe I should brush up on my ballers (players) so I can have some sort of inkling the next time one should cross my path!*wink*

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Can a bish be any less discreet?

I just returned from my lunch date with the guy that I previously posted about, the guy whom (while in my inebriated state)almost got me to commit cardinal sin number 1: leaving the club with a stranger for a night of pure raw, unadulterated, unbridled intercourse) Well anyway, we've met up on our lunch breaks before to dine together but this time was much more post worthy. By the way, my lunch was delicious *still licking my lips*. I had the grilled salmon with asparagus spears (yum yum) and an iced white tea lightly sweetened. It sure did hit the spot, I think I may stop by when I get off and pick up a duplicate for dinner since it is too hot to even begin to think about cooking. But anyway, we meet about a block from the place and walk over together. I may or may not have mentioned this before but this man is smart, sexy, good looking and most importantly EMPLOYED which equals PAID in his line of work! He's not really my type but I sense that we are well on our way to establishing a pretty cool friendship. While we're dining and conversing, I see these two broads at the table across from us staring my date up and down. Now, I'm not totally opposed to this because like I mentioned before, I can most definitely appreciate the attractiveness of a member of the opposite sex (shoot the same sex for that matter) but could them bitches at least be tactful about it. Everytime I look up, their eyes are on my table and my date. As we all know, Men are totally oblivious to such blatant ogling and the like ( How many times have you told a member of the male species that a certain female is trying to get at him and he says "Nah", "We're just friends" " She has a man" until one day she is so obvious about putting the moves on him (even to the point of getting butt ass naked and ready to spread 'em as soon as an opportunity arises)that he can no longer live in denial. Me, more times than I can count. The men in my family can be unbelieveably clueless at times. But anyway, I tell him that I think he has some stans or at the very least some admirers to which he replied. "Mi, you're crazy, they aren't thinking about me) I let it go and continue to enjoy lunch. We finish and I go to the restroom to fix myself up a bit , you know check to make sure there is no asparagus stuck in my teeth, refresh my MAC( don't even think to ask what MAC is, because if you don't know, you betta ask a diva) and give the hair a fluff or two. Anyway, as I'm heading back to the table, he is in the process of paying for our meal and I see the waitress give him a piece of paper. Small, albeit, but this sista here doesn't miss a thang!! I slow up a bit to time my arrival with her departure, then have a seat. I ask him what was that the waitress had given him and he shows it to me. The name scrawled on the torn napkin was Tamika and since our waitress was the whitest white girl one could possibly be, I knew it was from the stans across the way. Which one didn't matter but anyway, the waitress returns his card to him, I pick up my handbag and we start to walk out. On our way out, I head straight for the two chicks' table, walk up to them and say "Gorgeous isn't he?" and wink at one of the girls. She puts on a phony smile and smirks when I proceed to drop the number on the table and tell her unfortunately he won't be needing this because he is with me. I return her same phony smile and smirk, then head on out the door with my date in tow. Don't really know ( or give a fuck about how she reacted or what she had to say)I was out the door not giving them beyatches a second thought or glance. Don't really care what he thought either. All he could say was You are crazy!! Yeah it was sort of bold as we aren't together but I see it like this, you belong to me while we are together be it friend, lover, FB, or what.

Under the circumstances, I think a big, old, all inclusive"FUCK U" is warranted:



And a hefty "FUCK U" to the stan who couldn't seem to control her wandering eyes today at lunch!

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A lil' Sumpin' sumpin' for the shoe whores out there!!

If you are anything like me, you will absolutely *heart* these shoes! I am a tried and true shoe whore. They are my passion, just like frangances! (yeah, I'm a fragrance whore as well) I was doing what a diva does best and that is shopping, (online) because a bish cannot be out in the midst of this heatwave. It's 101 today (and climbing no doubt) but anyway, I came across this awesome site. Unfortunately they have no store in my city but thank God for the Internet!!! But anyway, This designer has tastes that mirror my own. I'm an eclectic type of chick. I'm not opposed to creating my own style and wearing some off-the wall shyt and not giving a dayum. When I saw these shoes I fell in love *drool*. Especially the first pair (which I commented on in the photo). This shoe is aptly named "The Porn" because you will feel like a tried and true whore when every man is walking around lusting after you after peeping your shoe game. These shoes are a steal ranging from $49.99 -$74.99 (ladies we know you can fend for yourself but still, make that man pay haha!) He'll love looking at your feet in "The Porn" while your legs are up on his shoulders and he is giving it to ya good(at least I hope he is), Besides, You are worth it!!. Enjoy Bishes!

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Keep Yourselves

So, I was watching some reruns of Making The Band when I was appalled at the fact that Andrea, (one of the band members) was actually losing sleep over a dude. Man up girl and get with the program. You are about to blow-up (Of course, it's a long shot being that they are involved with Puffy, the career killa, but hopefully it will happen for you) I mean that chick called her man just about every hour on the hour, but what I found even more incredulous, was the fact that this man never had time to talk to her. He was either in the studio (he's a supposed producer), on the way to the club, out with his boys, had people waiting for him and blase' blah. The poor girl was practically begging this guy to talk to her only for a few minutes and he couldn't (or wouldn't) do that. Now during this episode I can say that she called him at least 6 times wth him never having more than 2 to 3 minutes (if that) to talk to her. Fast forward a bit, she calls and this man has the nerve to get on her for not calling him the previous night (she fell asleep). Now from the very first time she called him I'm dayum near shouting at the Tele "drop that nigga girl, he's up to no-good" But I was literally speechless when this guy actually broke up with her for not calling. Now you and I both know that this nigga was probably fucking around from the time she hopped on a plane to Miami and that was just the perfect opportunity and (excuse for him to drop her) but dayum mayun, at least be honest? Why is it that we females become so consumed by our relationships? I mean our relationships become our lives and pretty soon we end up losing ourselves. We want to eat, sleep, and breathe that nigga that we know don't mean us a bit of good. We make sure we're home because he "might" call and the keyword here is "Might". We get mad when he doesn't and end up calling him trying to find out where he was last night and with whom and why he didn't call? He tells us he doesn't love us anymore and we lock ourselves in our rooms, eating ice-cream and crying our eyes out and for what? I say fuck that nigga? That's right, I said it, say it with me, FUCK DAT NIGGA!!" Take your game to the next level and make sure that man knows that you are the number 1 priority in all instances and he is dayum lucky to have you. He doesn't call, so what? Don't bombard him with 20 questions about why, where, and when, but instead, make him feel like he wasn't even missed. Let him know that he dayum sure can be NEXTED if he continues to fuck up. Go on about your life, if you have plans, keep them, don't alter them because dude might show up. You are wayyy more important than that. Start putting yourselves first and let him get in where he fits in. Never let a plain dude (or any dude for that matter) rule your world because you are running thangz around here. Always remember that!




Speaking of Danity Kane(that's the name of the Making The Band group), Wassup with that CD Photo? Why can't the black chicks ever get a chance to be front and center. Why do they have ugly Aubrey in the middle like the bitch really can sing? Like Ms. Jones said "only 3 of ya'll bitches can sing" and those three would be Dawn, Aundrea, And D woods (and even she is iffy). If I was D woods(aka Juanita), I would be pissed. All of them other bitches get to show skin and they got her covered up like she is the mama of the group. Not only that, but they got her ass off in the background like she isn't even really a part of Danity Kane. She's stepping on the opposite foot as everyone else looking like they just threw her ass in the photo as an after thought. She better get on Puff about that so he can correct it before their album debuts.

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Summa Daze, Summa Daze!!!

I have really gotten summer fever, so much so that a sista played hooky from work today to lounge pool side and chill. Unfortunately, I picked the wrong day because it was 100 today. Nobody should be out in this heat but I carried my butt to the pool anyway. Water felt good!!!! Usually it takes me a while to get used to the chill of the water but because it was so hot, I dove right in. I brought my book(Still Sheisty), my hat, my shades, my sunscreen(a Diva's best friend) and my water bottle and a sister was maxin' and relaxin'. Was enjoying the water and my solace until these 4 clowns (I.E. wanna be mack daddies) invaded my space. Why is it that a man will not take "NO" for an answer? These guys continued to get on my nerves. Sitting by me, singing, trying to strike up convos, touching my shit, and doing whatever else they could think of to keep my attention. I finally had to break out the bitch and get rude with them so there would be no mistaking that I wanted to be by my dayum self. I told them that I was there to relax and unwind and judging by the looks of them (there were 4 ) that there was nothing that they could do for me financially, or in the bedroom (had to include the dick since that is there magic answer to everything)so they may as well take their broke down behinds on to the next chick. Yeah, they called me all kinds of bitches to which I politely responded with a "Thank You" while shooing their trifling asses out of my space. Sometimes ladies, ya'll know that we just have to take it there because these men simply refuse to take "NO" for an answer. I really hate to go the rude route as that is not me-- Really it isn't, but some folks just are not satisfied until you bring the "Bish" out!!

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STFU!! Will ya?

FWB is getting on my last damn nerve! Why is this grown ass man whining and bitching in my ear. I do not have time for this bull! Look nukka, you are not my man and I don't owe you a dayum thing! Don't get me wrong now, I do enjoy your company, and I find you sexy as hell and you MOST definitely puts it down when it's time, but did you forget that we decided a while ago that we wouldn't put a label on our "relationship". We both decided that we didn't want or need to answer to anybody and we'd be together when we're together. Why in the hell are you trying to change the game plan, Now? I wanted a one on one relationship but YOU weren't ready so now that I'm in agreement, you want to be exclusive? Ain't that just like a man? Don't call me on my job whining because I ignored you last week when I had company and now I am going out tonight and you still haven't seen me. DO you Bruh!!! DO you!!! We are friends, I AM NOT YOUR WIFE!!! *end rant* Anyway, I am going out for Mojitos and Sushi tonight ( I really hate sushi but decided to give it another try. I had the california roll the last time and I was not a happy camper)and I haven't a clue what to wear, comfy casual, sexy casual,dressy, or jean it up? There's going to be a rather large group of us (guys and gals lol) lemme call up T and see what she is wearing. I don't really want to wear jeans, maybe I'll throw on a cute lil dress. Nothing too tight or too sexy though, don't want to steal anybody's shine haha.

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Alternative Lifestyle living folk, Whodathunk?

Okay, so my company has come and gone and me feeling a little bored last night decided to hit up the gay club scene. Now you know it wasn't my idea, only one person could come up with something so out-of-the box for me and that person is none other than my girl Jazzy. Of course I was like "Hell to the naw" ( Thanks Whit for my new catch phrase) but listening to her bitching and moaning all night would've driven me mad. She said that if I went, I wouldn't regret it because it is so much fun. I gave in and she calls up "Delicious" (yeah I know it's cliche right? Every gay male has to be named Peaches, Delicious or some other outlandish mess) and lets him know that we are on our way and will meet him at the club. Anyway we get there and the club is jumping. Mostly men, as would be expected, but there was a decent amount of females there as well. These men were fine, I tell ya, FIONE!! What a fuckin' waste of a big dick. All that gorgeousness going to waste. Now there were some obvious flamers but there were also a good mix of the thuggish, ruggish bones too. I mean save for the fact that I was in a gay club, I wouldn't have been able to tell that the coochie had no power in their midst( and I am one who always prided herself on her "gaydar".) Anyway, it was rather refreshing to be able to dance, get my drink on and socialize without having to worry about every man who thinks his game is tight trying to get with me. I ended up having a blast. The gay folk really know how to Pawtay and dare I take it a step further and say, you haven't really partied until you've been to a gay club. I mean we danced and sipped and danced some mo'. Delicious is a straight up nut and his clique/crew is even worse. They had me dancing on the bar and what not but I loved every minute of it. I had a few chicks trying to hit on me but I let them know with the quickness that I was all about the dick. This one chick approached me and she was gorgeous and her game wasn't as weak as I expected. Ya'll know, one of them slick mouth sistas. (Yeah, I can appreciate the beauty in a woman but I really don't think that I could ever go that route) but had there been an inkling of curiosity in me though, I would've given ol' girl about an hour or two lol. I really and truly enjoyed myself. I haven't partied like that in a minute and I didn't give a damn about my hair, make-up smudging, sweat or anything. I was just there to have fun, dance, drink, mingle. and release some pent up stress lol. One thing I did notice was that they just do not give a fuck either. No fakeness or pretenses whatsoever. I like that vibe. Anyway after that we stopped at IHOP, (Delicious and crew in tow), got our grub on and then I headed for home. I know my behind did not need to be out partying like it was 2009 when I had to go to work in the morning but hell, I'm young and you only live once, am I right? I exchanged phone numbers with Delicious and although he is Jazzy's friend, we clicked big time. I'mma steal him away from her lol . He's fly, fierce and crooked as hell so you know I'll be having lots of stories to tell. Hey that rhymed. lol

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Whew. Busy Busy Me!

I have been so busy lately. I had relatives in from out-of-town and I have been running and spending like mad. I've been to the casinos just about everyday this week, eating at the buffets and losing my money lol. Well, my last day I did win my money back. I took about 90 dollars and when I got down to my last 20 I won it all back (playing the penny slots) except for $10. At least I came back with something so it's cool. I've been eating out a lot too. I told my guests that we sure have been eating too much and they said not really. Yes, we've been eating out damn near everyday but most of the time, that was the only meal that we would eat so I guess it all balances out. They will be gone tomorrow morning and it's back to the old grind for me. I love having out-of-town guests, It's fun taking them around the city and doing things that I wouldn't normally do but I'd much rather be the one doing the visiting. I will be on my vacay next month and I cannot wait,WhoooHOOO!!!

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Who am I you ask?

I AM:

~~A wearer of strappy heels,figure flattering 'fit and well manicured/pedicured parts
~~Mildly obsessed with intoxicating fragrances, matt lipsticks, juicy tubes, and
exfoliation
~~Open minded, honest, loyal, generous to a fault(but in no way stupid or naive)
~~Down for my peeps, my family, my friends, and my man
~~Viewer of various perspectives, all the while being overtly introspective
~~Ironic, sometimes a walking contradiction.
~~Avoider of controversy, forseer of "drama" Yet in no wise clairvoyant.
~~Trusting,yet suspicious
~~As real as they come
~~Femininity personafied,yet prone to handle my shyt whenever the need may arise
~~a daughter,sister,lady,friend,lover,confidant and such a girl.
~~Your muse as well as your vice ~wink~
~~A cultivator of new ideas, a doer and a thinker.
~~Vain yet modest, vulnerable yet confident.
~~A dream and at times your worst nightmare
~~But always, I AM:

A WOMAN!!!!

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Bey Bey Bey. Hated it!

So, the much talked about video from tam Bey-Z finally debuted Wednesday. Yes, that's right folks, the video for Deja Vu is here! I can say that I wasn't really feeling it too much. First of all, the majority of the outfits, were monstrosities. Pin-stripes, big peasant blouses, come on now? We understand that you need to advertise for House of Dereon but you and I both know that most of the designer wear they sell is nothing more than over-priced garbage. The jeans are cool and a few of the tops but I'm going to really need Ms. Tina to get some designer inspiration STAT! Secondly, The locations were cool. Loved the swamp/Bayou feel and of course, Jay-z is always good, but Bey on the other hand, dancing and shaking like she was having a canniption could've done much better. Who told her she could dance? I mean really? Her spastic movements along with shaking and shimmying does not a dancer make? A megastar like her should've been in dance classes ASAP. Aayway, if You haven't already, you can check it out on MTV'S Overdrive.

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I've been a bad, bad, girl but fuck it. ladies is pimps too go on and brush yo shoulder off.

I really don't know what in the heck has come over me. AN ex,not THE ex called me out of the blue and wanted to see if I wanted to go to the show (movies) with him. I didn't have any other plans and I knew that a movie always included dinner afterwards so I said why not? I get off work and throw on some jeans and a halter and my pumps and wait for dude. He shows up and I open the door and let me tell ya'll this man was looking fine as hayel!!! One look at him and my legs started getting weak and my pussy wet. All of a sudden I didn't feel like going out anymore I just wanted to stay in and feel this man inside me,10 toes in the air and legs wrapped around his back. I tell him that I really didn't feel like going out after all and suggested we rent a movie and watch it at my spot. A nugga is always down for some action so of course he was with it. We go get some movies, I got Love Jones. He never saw it before (and with any luck he would be missing it again) and he got some kind of scary shit. While we're there, I suggest stopping to get some take-out and he says no, he wants to cook( this man can throw down in the kitchen too) so we head to the grocery store and he picks up the ingredients he needs to whip up some chicken marsala. Ok ya'll that meal was slammin'. Along with the chicken marsala, we had pasta,asparagus an a cheese cake for dessert. After that we hit the couch and I put in the movie. We're laying back chillin' sippin on some JD twisted and I lay my head in his lap. He starts stroking my hair then rubbin' on my chests and then I reach up and pull him down to me (by his neck) and we start kissing. Next thing I know, clothes come off and I am bouncing on that dick riding the hell out of it like that damn dick was going to disappear in 2 and 2. Damn that was some good shit too. Afterwards it was kind of awkward because deep down I wanted to tell him to get the fuck up and go home but I allowed him to spend the obligatory night. It was good at the time but that is so not me. Why did he have to show up looking and smellin all good and shit? Anyway that's my little "Ho" moment. Just thought I'd share.

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The ex has been blowing up my spot bigtime. I can't really say that we ever really kept in contact consistently but lately he's been calling a lot. The first call was unexpectedly out of the blue. He was thinking about me( so he says) and wanted to see what I was up to. Okay, that's cool. We had a nice convo, reminisced, talked about our relationship, He thanked me and told me how much I meant to him back then and blase' blah. He says he would like to see me(mind you ...not to try to get with me but just to see an "old friend".) Says I can stay with him or he can come and see me. I said I don't know about that. He tried to feign being hurt that I wouldn't want to see him again,which isn't exactlyw hat I said. I just said that I didn't know about that. But anyway, I have talked to him about 3 or 4 times in the past two weeks which is really saying a lot. I wonder what is up with him? He told me he doesn't have a girlfriend when he first called, preferring to refer to her only as "my baby mama" which in laymens terms translates to yes, she had my child, yes we are still fucking even though I don't claim her as my woman to other females.I really don't mind him calling although I don't think that I would ever get back together with him. That's a part of my life that is best left in the past. We can be friends all day every day but as for anything more, I don't think so (but I've learned to never say never.)

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Must haves for sexy, single divas

Yeah, I'm supposed to be working but so what. I came in extra early today so I deserve this little bit of time to play around online and unwind, nahimean? Anyway, I've been shopping up a storm lately. Yes, I'm a budget fashionista, diva on a budget , champagne taste on a beer budget or what have you. I'm thrifty and I'm not ashamed to say it. I'm always on the lookout for a good deal or bargain so if any of you can help a chick out Holla!!! Hell, why pay full price when I can find it cheaper on sale. I've been trying to get my summer wardrobe together, get all the pieces I need to ensure that I will have a fabulous summer but while I was doing that, I started thinking of other things so here it is:

My top 10 things every single girl must have aside from the perfect shade of mac lipstick and the fuck me dress and shoes.







1. A fabulous photo of yourself We all have that photo: The one where your smile looks great , hair is on point , and your body is bangin'. You are the total package and you know that if you just walked down the street looking like that you would have all of the men drooling for days. Maybe it was a surprise shot taken by a friend or you got the flic taken at glamour shots, who the hell cares as long as you know you look good in it. Post that sucker at eye level on your fridge, in your wallet, on the dashboard or mirror of your car, hell get a 20 by 30 framed portrait made and hang that bytch up in the foyer or above your bed. You want every man, woman and child that comes in contact to know that you look damn good! You may also need to take a gander at it when your confidence may be low due to a bad hair day or whatever. You are fabulous and you should always know it or at least be able to see it!
2. A slammin' pair of heels Admit it. you feel absolutely fabulous when you slip on a pair of nice heels. Struttin' and switching down the street feeling sexy as hell. I mean can't nobody tell you a damn thang. I know you know what I mean. The good news is that these days, you can transform virtually any outfit into night on the town ready by adding a nice pair of heels. Doesn't matter if you are sportin' jeans, skirt, shorts (yes, jeans and shorts are totally acceptable as an outfit especially on the club scene) gauchos, whatever... doesn't matter!! Put some heels on with that baby and you are ret' ta go. No, they don't have to be 4 or 5- inch stilettos, even a pair of 1-inch kitten heels will make you stride a little more confidently and don't mind the fact that you may not be able to walk in them. As long as you look good in them. You can just post up at the bar or at a table somewhere, legs crossed and work it mamis. (For the times when your dogs really get to barking in the heels) Always have a pair of comfortable shoes on hand or go barefoot if you must. Just make sure that when you are around the men you put the heels on and style, floss, and profile like crazy.
3. At least 4 good Cd's Hiphop, Mood music( you know the good baby making get your freak on type shyt),Jazz,and an off the wall type that usually doesn't fit your taste,you know, to show that eclectic side. What's one of the first places a guy peruses when he walks into a woman's home? Her music collection. Good for you if you have an extensive one, but if you are stuck in the 80's or 90's and your most up-to-date CD just happens to be by Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince, you might have some "splaining" to do. Update your collection pronto mamis. Preferably with a CD from each musical genre because one night you may be keeping company with a youngin' and the next day you may want to have his daddy over. You need to be able to accomodate all musical taste. Doesn't matter how young or old you are.. DO IT! You have no idea how relieved he'll be. It shows you have an open mind and are open to all types of music. Plus it wouldn't hurt to throw a raunchy hip hop Cd in the mix. You know the type with a lot of Fuck you's, bitches and hoe's. Doesn't matter if it doesn't get any play in your CD player but it does show that you aren't easily offended—and that's music to any man's ears.
4. A great pickup line... and a way to blow 'em off In this post-chivalrous period Ya'll know that we can't always depend on guys to initiate contact. The days are over when we see a fine looking man and let him slip through our fingers because he never got up the nerve to approach. If you aren't quite ballsy enough just yet to take matters into your own hands that's fine. You'll get there eventually, but in the mean time, down a few drinks and man up chica. In any event, prepare thyself with one simple, non-corny icebreaker to lay on that cutie who's making his way over to your area of the bar. My favorite: "Hi. Having fun?" Depending how blatant and forward you are ,you can also use, "Hetero, homo, DL or metro?"(yeah it's extremely forward but let's cut to the chase shall we, why waste time entertaining a man who may be more interested in the brotha standing behind you) For those moments when the guy initiates contact and you're just not that into him, better have a back-up plan to get rid of the buster and please ladies, come with something better than "Ummmm, no". "Sorry, I don't think my man would like or appreciate it." is always a good , polite let down ( Yeah, it may or may not be a lie but at least it'll let him save face in front of his boys as well as allow him to keep his astronomical ego in tact. It'll also keep you from becoming all kinds of bitches, lesbians, and hoes) but sometimes a chick needs to get ignorant for the men that just don't give a damn about you having a man. I'm sure you know the "what your man got to do with me?" " Ah fuck that nigga", "Where that nigga at then" type of man. For that type of persistent, refuse to take no for an answer guy you must and I'd like to reiterate, YOU MUST have something for his ass. I won't give you any lines as they can run the gamut. Crack on his outfit, his looks, teeth, jewelry, hair. breath, lack of funds, job, anything you can do to clown him and get him to move the hell on is fair game.
5. A six-pack of beer and a few bottles of champagne. A prepared single girl is always ready to host and toast at any time. Keep the brew on tap so you can have something to offer your man if and when you decide that he is worthy enough to visit your humble abode. Champagne or any liquor will do for the times you have little get togethers or just want to chill. Always have one unbelieveable, outrageously priced bottle of something. (this is for show only, just to let them know you have good expensive taste) Under no circumstances are any of your guests ever to crack open that bottle. In other words, They touch it, They die! If you are more thrifty and don't want to spend the money on a expensive bottle,visit a snazzy restaurant or bar and request the empty bottle. (Don't be ashamed girl) You can then fill it up with colored water and perpetrate to your hearts content! They'll never know, But if you are a true diva with your game intact, getting a real bottle of expensive bubbly should be no problem.
6. Bathroom reading What man doesn't appreciate finding interesting reading in his woman's bathroom? So instead of tossing out your magazines when you're done reading them, toss them into a basket by the toilet. No need to go overboard with a stack of Sports Illustrated especially if you don't follow sports,( that could get you into trouble when he starts asking you about players and their stats and you are left dazed and stuttering), but consider Newsweek, Cosmo,(hey, this may be the only time he's a captive audience and can learn a few things) or even a King or Stuff magazine (yeah let him know that you aren't threatened by beautiful women and you can even include your Fabulous photo from Number 1 in the mix). Or, just buy a book that's made for the bathroom, like Ever Wonder Why,Isaac Asimov's Book Of Facts,The Great American Bathroom Book or whatever floats your boat so that he can learn a few things while he passes the, uh, time.
7. A business card After the age of 21, it is no longer cute to scrawl your first name and phone number on a napkin and hand it to a man who wants to call you. Doesn't matter if you have no job (or business for that matter)or your job doesn't provide you with a business card. Maybe you would just prefer one with your personal email address and cell phone number on it, then have some made at your local Kinko's. If you are very thrifty or a budget diva/fashionista like myself, you can even get 250 full-color business cards for free from vistaprint.com if you don't mind the company's logo on the backside of the card. Hey, it's better than nothing and lets not forget the operative word here ladies. It's FREE!!!!!. A napkin he can lose, blow his nose on, wipe his ass,wipe his sweat away or any number of things, but a business card, he'll file and keep.
8. A straight male friend on your speed-dial for advice and another one for those inevitable booty calls, bustdowns or nights when you just need a lil' sumpin' sumpin' without the lip and commitments. No ties, no strings right? Every girl knows she needs a gay male friend she can go to for fashion advice , hair and makeup tips and one that will not lie when you ask "Does my ass look fat or Phat in these jeans?" (a personal Queer Eye of your own). But when it comes to relationship advice, you need another source. While your female friends may have good intentions (we all know that sometimes they may be on some jealousy, hatin' ass shit), if you really want to know if you should call that guy, let him hit it on the first night, introduce him to your kids, let him crash on the couch, pull some rug, or hit the sheets 3, 4 night in a row, save the guesswork and go to someone who's been there, done that. No one knows the mind of a man save for another man. He'll be honest and let you know what's really up!
9 and 10. (Yes, this counts as 2)A condom ( a few condoms) Preferably Magnums if applicable~wink~, Hey ladies, you know the drill by now. If you want to be able to have spontaneous fun of the bodily kind, you have to prepare for it yourself. You can't always count on him to have something in his back pocket, wallet,—or a 24-hour drugstore in route on the way home. Yeah, I know I stated preferably Magnums ( men always exaggerate their size and their ego may demand they use magnums even when it isn't necessary)but the truth is everyone is not packin' like that... so if you don't want you man looking like he is swimming in a 5 sizes too big windbreaker, it would behoove you to have a variety of sizes and flavors on hand. (Your new mantra: If you don't want it to break, (have holes poked in it, be outdated), you buy it.
And That concludes my Top 10 list of things every woman should have

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Relax, Relate, Release.....AHHHHH!!

Today was such a relaxing day for me.




The jazz spot last night turned out to be surprisingly nice. Yeah, there were mostly oldheads there but I was really diggin' the atmosphere and it felt nice to take a break from the 20-something knunkle heads that I'm used to encountering. I didn't really feel like driving home so I just crashed at Miko's. After I left Miko's I met up with Ronnie at the spa for a day of pampering. Man I really needed to be rubbed down. By the way it was heavenly. Ronnie and I had a mud soak and then the massage of a life time. It was glorious, although my masseur wasn't the big , bald, fine man that I had hoped for. Nothing better than to be rubbed down by a pair of strong hands attatched to a muscular, bangin' body and a handsome face. Unfortunately, my fantasy was ruined by a lady named Marisol. She was good, I'll give her that. That woman hit some muscles that I had forgotten I even had, but It would've been nice to have someone to flirt with. After that, Ronnie had a Brazillian. She has been trying to get me to have one done for the longest time. She says that men love it and once I have it done I will never imagine going back to anything else. I really want to give it a try but I have a real aversion to pain without any pleasure involved. I just can't see myself butt ass naked, spread eagle on a table while some woman is ripping the hair from my twat and my azz. I mean they get in all of the nook and crannies too and if that isn't bad enough, after they finish plucking you like a chicken, they then slap some powder on you like you are ready to be fried. I'm just not ready to put myself out there like that so I passed and let Ronnie do her thang. Now I must admit, it does look good (Ronnie was nice enough to show me the finished product)) they even do designs if you want them. Ronnie has a little landing strip with a heart and she says the pain is about a 5 on a scale of 1-10. Yeah right!! A five for her because she has been getting them forever. She is used to the pain. I wonder if guys really prefer a bald pussy? (Ronnie swears they do but I haven't had any complaints) Does less hair make it better when going down on a chick? I'll have to ask someone and see what they say. Anyway, after finishing up with our mani's and pedi's we part ways and I head home to relax some more.
I have been reading this book, Sexual Healing, for about 2 months now. Everytime I read it I get horny as hell. It's about these two women who decide to make a brothel for women. They are in vegas and they have man whores to service female clients. Of course they have to test out the new hires and boy do they go into detail. I get wet everytime I read a line. Too bad my FWB(friend with benefits) is out of town. I don't own a vibrator either which is another thing that I need to add to my list of things to buy. Hey, guys aren't the only ones that need to get their freak on every now and then, us girls get horny too. I'm really feeling it right now and am so tempted to work myself out but I'll settle for a homemade non- alcoholic apple martini and a cold shower instead. It would just take me too long to get there alone, without a little electric help. Too bad too because my "friend" will be here next week so when FWB returns he won't be able to have a proper welcome home. Boo Hoo!! The joys and monthly pains of being a woman. I'm off, since I have to get up early for work tomorrow. Nighty Night!

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I ain't ret' ta go, I'm ready for him to hit this.

Miko is dragging me out to this little Jazz spot tonight and I really really don't feel like going. I must be growing up because once or twice a week is more than enough for me to be out and about. There was a time when I would live at the clubs,I'm talking Tuesday through Sunday but now I'm kind of tiring of the club scene. I went out last night and almost got into some trouble, Thank God my girls were there looking out!!! When I got home from work I started reading this damn book..urban fiction, ghetto love stories and the sex scenes in that mug were Hot!! Anyway they got me a little worked up so I was horny as hell already and couple that with the liquor I was sippin' on all night and you have one potential "ho" in the making. Guess I was on a mission to get some dick and it just so happened to be attatched to this fine specimen of a man. I mean that brotha was BEAUTIFUL, no other way to describe him. But anyway, we lock eyes and kind of stare each other down and then I guess he works up the nerve to come talk to me. We vibin' real well for the majority of the night and my damn panties are getting wet just looking at him. We dance and he's getting his little feel on and the way that I am feeling , sheeeittt I welcome it. We dance and chat and then he goes to the bar and comes back with a drink for me. I thank him but I'm thinking ain't no way in hell I'm drinking that shit. Now I may be a little buzzed but I'm not stupid and if I don't see you make it or I didn't open it myself I'm not drinking it. You can't do that shit now-a-days with nukkas slippin' shit in your drink on the sly. But anyway, it's getting close to last call and by that time, I'm really feeling it. I'm really wanting to fuck now. Yeah we kissed a bit and felt each other up and then when I'm ready to roll out with dude here come my girls dragging my ass back to the truck. Thank God they were in their right frame of mind becasue ya girl was ready to ride some serious dick. Dude handled the situation okay too. He called me this afternoon and wants to meet me for lunch tomorrow. I told him tomorrow is my spa day but since we both work downtown we could meet for lunch Monday. He's a real cool dude so I'm really looking forward to our lunch date. shoot, it's almost 10 and if Miko don't get here within the hour, I'm calling it a night. I don't really feel like going out anyway.

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