Memories

Today my girls and I went to the spa. Sundays are usually reserved for the spa but I haven't been in about 3 weeks. After today, you can best believe my ass will be there every Sunday from here on out! I really needed to be rubbed down, pampered, and just doted on! I didn't realize how much I really, really needed that. It also gave me a chance to spend some quality time with the girls catching up on gossip and shyt. Not that I don't talk to those heffas every day and see at least one of them daily, but you know it's hard to get all of us together without putting forth plenty of effort and aforethought (especially since one of the crew is now bogged down by the old ball and chain.) I hated to leave such a relaxing environment but they would've had to start charging me rent had I not decided to carry my ass home. I look great, I feel great, relaxed and mellow and my skin looks and feels like Butta~~~ Butta, I tell ya! So I get home and I'm just chillin', sippin'on a JD twisted and watching Ghost ( don't act like ya'll don't know about the Patrick Swayze, Demi Moore, Whoopi Goldberg flick) and I hear the phone ring. The caller ID says cellular call (gotta love the caller ID, can screen mofo's 'til my hearts content) and I recognize the area code as being that of Philly. I answer the phone and since the voice isn't familiar to me..I do my speil of "who's calling" blah, blah, blah. Turns out to be an ex whom I haven't spoken to in about 4 or 5 years. Why did he call and want to read some love letters that I had written to him over 10 years ago? lol It's so weird how things like that can affect you. Now mind you, I haven't spoken with this particular young man in years, much less thought about him, but since we hung up, he has been on my mind way to much. We had a some what volatile relationship. Back then, I was truly a party girl and all we did was drink, smoke and fuck. Man, we had some mind blowing sex. Whew Chile!!! Did we have some dayum good sex! ( got me reminiscing and shyt haha!) But we all know a fuck ( no matter how mind blowing) does not a good and solid relationship make. We vowed to keep in touch though...well he did since it's no big secret that I'm extremely bad about calling folks. He is supposed to call me later on. I seriously would never consider getting back together with him. I did see him a few years back. I was in Philly visiting a friend and she and I had a falling out. I guess she called herself kicking me out of her house so she called him to come and pick me up. He did and was in the process of carrying my bags to his car when we made up and I decided to continue my visit with her. I wasn't too attracted to him then because he had changed so much since the time we were together. I can say this though, he is doing well, financially and in his career. Much better than he did when he was with me (which isn't too hard to do because he wasn't doing shyt when he was with me.) Now he's damn near making 6 figures and talking about getting his Masters to boot. Ain't that some shyt though? When we were together all this man could think about was eating, drinking, smoking and fucking. I'm proud of him though and secretly I take pleasure and some of the credit for him finally getting on the grind and doing something with himself. I held his ass down while we were together, put up with all of his BS,listened when he needed an ear, gave advice, cheered him on and loved him unconditionally when he was at his lowest (I'm talking rock bottom, suicidal shyt here.. I guess the military really does fuck with a brothas mental) I'm pleased at how far he's come and I am so happy that he is doing well. I also know how Bey feels with the thought of another bitch reaping Her rewards which brings me to my next question: Why is it that guys don't want to do shit while they are with you but as soon as you break up they then decide to get their shit together? Maybe if he had been on the ball like he is now, we would've still been together. Nahhh I doubt it. He had major issues and drama and I had some baggage of my own. In hindsight, I now realize it never would've worked (and to think we both thought we would be married to each other by now)I couldn't trust him. He cheated on me and even though I tried to forgive him I just couldn't and that was it for us. Anyway, I do wish him well but now I'm hungry so let me go rustle me up something to eat or better yet, have someone pick me up some food from my favorite bistro! I'm feeling like a slammin' greek salad and some french bread right about now!